App Attack and Other Non-Original Headlines

I have an idea for an app. This, of course, assumes you know what an app is. But for the un-initiated an app is like a program but instead of being called a program they call it an app.

All caught up? Good.

So I have an idea for an app. It basically keeps track of all the apps you have on your phone, or tablet, or computer or whatever. It'll read your phone or ... Whatever and tell you what apps you have in one handy list. Maybe it'll tell you when you last used said apps but that's not important, the important part is the list. That way you can look at all the apps you have in one handy list and admire them and maybe show people and say "look at all the apps I have. Why I even have three in which I can order pizza!"

Now I know you are thinking to yourself that an app like this is worthless but I'm telling you it is nessissary and inevitable, because why else would we have so damn many apps on our device in the first place if it wasn't to show people how many apps we have.

Let's look at my phone. I have a game on my phone that I don't like playing, that I avoid playing at every opportunity, and yet I can't get rid of it because if I do I lose all the games I don't want to play. So when people see it on the list it shows how smart I am that I am playing said game. 

Makes sense?

I also have an app for a coffee chain. I can't for the life of me tell you why I have it but it's a Canadian chain so when someone see's it on the list they will know I am patriotic!

There is a music search app, that shows I am into the music scene that the kids today are into. A movie search app, which people will see and know I am a lover of visual arts. A book reader program and an app for a national book chain, I am well read.

Also I have one that tells you the weather with pictures of kitties. Because I like kitties and I like knowing what the weather. It's two great tastes that taste great together!

Are you starting to see the beauty of the list? With just one glance people can see the person you pretend on your phone you are, and you can see who they pretend to be and you can both pretend to admire each other without all that pesky swiping with your finger.

I'll sell it for $1.99 because I'm a generous person. You are welcome world!