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A VERY SPECIAL “GOLD MEDAL” ISSUE |
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OUTWIT, OUTSMART, OUTLAST |
VANCOUVER – All eyes were focused on Vancouver, British Columbia as the 2010  Winter Olympic games began. Nations of the world marched into BC Place stadium with their heads held high and their hopes held higher. The world watched in awe as scenes from the history of Canada were performed before them. Dancers performed interpretive scenes from The Beachcombers while the worlds largest barbeque cooked up back bacon all to Ann Murray music … I think, I don’t know. Undercover Boss was on so I watched that. Anyway, Goooooooooooo Canada! |
OUVRE LA F’NETRE, FERMER LA PORTE |
OTTAWA - Meanwhile, Canadian Heritage Minister and all around party-pooper James Moore  says he was "disappointed" with the amount of French used during the 2010 Winter Olympic Games' opening ceremony. Moore told CBC on Sunday that the spectacle should have been "a better representation of our bicultural past and the reality today." As a token of conciliation, the Canadian Olympic Committee has announced that the closing ceremonies will be a tribute to Rene Simard, include a salute to the “Les Boys” movie series and have the worlds biggest poutine pulled into the stadium by Crique du Soleil performers. Happy now? |
TAKE THAT! |
| OTTAWA – Foreign Affairs Minister Lawrence Cannon sent a stern warning to Iran, accusing the country of ignoring international pleas to stop developing nuclear material. “I’m warning them, “ Cannon said in Ottawa, “And sternly.” “Oooooooooooooh.” Iran is reported to have replied. |
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KATE PLUS 200 PAGES OF CRAP |
Noted Baby momma Kate Gosselin, of Jon & Kate Plus High Profile Divorce fame, has released her third book. The book, titled I Just Want You to Know, is a collection of journal entries, letters to her children and pictures of her really bitchin’ hair style, intended to inspire other mothers of eight children who married a douche bag. |
CPFOG the Blog IS PROUD TO PRESENT: A SHORT LOOK INSIDE OF KATE GOSSELIN’S NEW BOOK |
| Chapter One: It’s about faith, love and exploiting your children. Chapter Two: If at first you don’t succeed, try a new hair style. Chapter Four: To my oldest children. Don’t worry, Mommy still loves the money you bring in. Chapter Eight: What a douche bag is and why Daddy is one. Chapter Twelve: Someday I hope you all have children of your own that you can whore out on TV. |
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| CPFOG the Blog is: Gord Gardiner – Writer Jen Gardiner - Poofradir |
Monday, February 15, 2010
WEEKLY NEWS ROUNDUP for Monday, February 15, 2010
